New Year Report

As we head into the New Year, a look into Will and Jasper:

Will is seven now and is still headlong into the age of boundless curiosity, expanding his limits, and exploring values/morals. I'm finding it a difficult age in the sense that he can't always be trusted to tell the truth, stick to the rules/expectations, or be predictable. I'm continually amazed at what he is capable of--both the good and the bad! Don't even ask me what I've found squirreled away up in his bunk bed!

But I would describe him as a very tender hearted, deliberate, and open minded person. He gets along with everyone from what I can tell. He loves to play and be with his posse of girls. He has absolutely no problem being the only boy in sewing class or the lone boy at a birthday party with fourteen other girls. But he can switch gears easily and play with his (boy) friends too as long as it isn't a game of basketball or touch football!

I was laughing so much at a recent phone message left by his neighborhood friend: "Hi Will~I'm building a fort out of popsicle sticks and toothpicks and thought that you would like to help me."

But the let's counter that with a message from another friend who called to invite him over to knit together and do dancing in her room with glowing lightsticks.

I can safely say that Will and his brother are opposites in their athleticism. Will loves to bike, run and swim (a triathalete!) but is not at all interested in team sports. His brother, on the other hand, is entranced by any ball playing. He will stand immobile for 20 minutes watching guys play soccer or basketball. If there is a ball anywhere in the vicinity he wants to play with it and he is proving to be quite an athlete already! Jasper's main activity is moving his body-- jumping, running, climbing, kicking, throwing, sliding, swinging... etc. He is almost always breathing a little heavy because he does everything fast and with maximum effort.

Will is such a funny mix. It wouldn't be unusual for him to have me buy him some heart shaped pearl beads with red ribbons and a metal pulley with rope. He tells me that he wants to be a scientist (specifically a physicist) and an artist when he grows up. A great combination! He liked the color pink for many years but transitioned to turquoise last year and has now moved on to green because "it reminds him of leaves, trees, and nature".

Will is a fabulous big brother and is very closely involved in the care of his brother. He helps him get dressed, eat, play, read books, use the potty, get into and out of his carseat, get into and out of his stroller, walk across the street, etc. Sometimes Will is too nice though and gives his brother his most cherished possessions even though he knows that Jasper is not old enough to handle them. So we are working to find the balance between allowing little brother to be upset when he doesn't get something he wants and for big brother to bear the protest!

In some ways the age span is so huge between them that Will becomes more like a dad than a sibling. But I have to admit that when I see mothers with two young siblings bickering and tantruming together I feel grateful for Will's maturity and help. I love sharing with him the responsibility of our little Jasper. I rely on him to do so much and in return I think he is really learning how to parent. I hope a lot of it sticks with him when he grows up to parent his own children.

Jasper remains a real treasured person in our family. He has an incredible sense of humor and timing. Everyone who knows him says that they have never seen him unhappy or irritable and as long as his mama is around, he is either busily exploring or quietly cuddled into a hip. Jasper is quick in so many ways. He is a quick learner, quick mover, and quick to laugh. He does not miss a thing!

The other day Will and I took him to the pool and I figured he would be timid as it has been awhile since we've gone swimming. I slowly bring him into the pool and set him down expecting him to be unsure at first. He laughs, wades over to the edge, gets out then yells, "Yabadabadoo!" and jumps in!

I remember that Will was always so deliberate and slow about everything he did but Jasper is almost exactly the opposite. Jasper catches every single detail with just one glance, makes quick decisive movements, and is immediately and constantly busy. I perceive that much of this as being the second sibling. He has to be quick if he wants to usurp his brother and we don't always have time to wait around for him. He has learned to quicken up his pace just out of necessity.

The funny part is that Will also was such an easy going kid. While I would say that now he is fairly meticulous about things, he was pretty flexible as a little one. Jasper is not proving to be that way. He has very clear expectations that his brother definitely did not express at this age. For example, Jasper loves to use napkins for wiping his hands and tissues for his nose and he simply will not be without these things the minute he needs to wipe his hands or has sneezed. He absolutely does not like to have wet or soiled underwear and dramatically grabs his crotch when it is time to use the toilet. He expects to have a little towel by the bath so that he can wipe his face and he loves to wash his body FULLY with soap at bathtime. He has specific routines for nap and bedtime as well as for meals. He brings everyone their shoes when we are leaving for somewhere. He actually likes to try on different shoes or accessories. He puts his toys out on a little rug and usually puts them away when he is finished.

Jasper communicates mostly with body language as he has minimal words. He says, "ca" for cat, "da" for dog or dad, "mama" for me, "right there", "oh no", "uh oh", "no no", "me", "mine". Other words seem to be present but inconclusive. Jasper was evaluated by a speech therapist and will be starting therapy soon to help him with his speech. Because he is in a study at UW he has had pretty extensive developmental testing so I know he is not autistic and either normal or above average in all the other areas. In language he is only at 8th percentile! We are just waiting for some words in this New Year!